Sunday, March 14, 2010

HappY 3

You’re my first boyfriend
And the best thing I could say is we started as friends
Still I felt that I was your first
Though technically speaking I am not and yes, history can’t be reversed
I never even really knew exactly how your love stories were, back then
I believe each love story was something special for you as well and then it end
But well, I don’t want to be compared
I don’t even want to be better than them
I wanted ours to be different and new
I wanted ours to be first and only for me and you
You lose the presidency
And I can no longer be your first lady
I don’t need such title in reality.
Just let me be your one and only

People wonder on how it all began
Everything remained fresh on my mind and even how things were said and done
One night we were walking
and it was fine with me when you held my hand
It was not the first time we held hand walking
Yet it was the first time relationships involving us was our topic while talking
I often wonder all the ‘HIRIT’ and sweet thoughts of text messages were all about
I am not blind or insensitive,
it meant something and I wanted it clear straight from your mouth
And then we threw questions and the answers came so fluent and startling
The gist of the story was simple.
You said you like me
It was strange yet truly flattering.

Subsequently I told you that I am giving myself a chance to grow
You told me as well that what we need is Experience for us to mature and so
Funny it may seem but I asked for my family and closest friends’ blessing
They supported me with saying YES that feels so pleasing
You courted me
for three months and some days (August 22, 2009)
I would say that those were the finest times
Of being cared of and being shown with much affection and attention
It was a mixture of so much emotion
fun, kilig, excitement, as well as fear and tension
I love such experience of courtship, I really do
I regret the times I did not let my other potential suitors to do so (LOL)
Well I was also afraid of getting hurt or hurting you on the other end
At the same time I was afraid of saying YES and not fulfilling such commitment
It was a constant battle of my ideals and wants
I think I was trapped with my principles and taking the risk became so tough to grant

But many are the happy memories together
We would talk for hours in the phone
Or accompany me in going home
We would share stories
As we get to know each other more
You don’t like soy sauce and vinegar
Your much loved colors include Orange and brown
By then you can hug me freely,
Go to R building comfort room to pee
Sit for a while around Pryce Tower or Landco building
And you’ll wait for me till my class ends
You were very concern when I go out all alone
You even asked friends to accompany me along
The gesture was really so sweet (sweetness)
And my heart happily tweets
I’m a super-independent kind of woman most of the time
But knowing someone cares for me the way you do feels just so great and really fine

We had several analysis moments
And you have shown your being wise-
First was the time I wasn’t over yet with someone from my past
Second is when I constantly entertain my fears and worries more than what is positive to last

We think and approach things so differently
And you would give me a perspective that is unambiguous, constructive and real
I am too ideal
And there you are so practical
You persistently remind me to live in the present
and taking risks would mean less regrets
I believe and definitely affirm that you’re right
Cause now, I took the risk of being with you (December 12, 2009)
And I am happier and precisely better, I hope it’s the same with you.

You may not be totally my ideal guy
But you gave me the special kind of love and happiness that is beyond compare, I swear
A first love story that brought me feelings of bliss and sometimes worry
A first time journey of love, commitment and continual learning

I love you the way you are
I love the many times we’re together
I love the times you went to 6th floor to see and be with me
I love reading the text messages we shared that would make me giggle, kilig and inlove all over again
I love it when you will hold my hands or place them on my waist
I love it when you whisper the words ‘I love you’
It melts my heart and it means so much
I love it when I just look at you and then I will smile
I love it also when I hold your face, your chin, your ears
I love Thursdays and uwian- I’m pretty sure you’ll be with me so near
I love smelling you and then hug you tight
I love talking to you or just be with you even in silence all through the night

So, I say thank you for being YOU
And I truly care for you
I thank you for being there for me
I thank you for appreciating the person in me
Thank you for making me laugh
And thank you for listening when I just need to cry
Thanks as well for your means of making me strong
Hugging each other gives me warmth and security that makes all things go right from being wrong
I still wake up at times
Amazed that you’re mine and we’re together
It’s crazy that I still smile so suddenly out of the blue when I think of you

You bring out the best in me and somehow the worst of me
You know what I mean and still you say you like it.
You’re a great leader
An exceptional student (Most Outstanding junior) and a caring brother
You’re very irresistible and sometimes childish.
You’re frank and funny- a fact I shouldn’t missed.
You may be maldito, dali kapuyon and mysterious
Still I always see the kind-hearted, clever and responsible person in YOU
In my eyes you’ll always be handsome and striking
In my heart, you’ll always be dear and outstanding
You’re a blessing in my life
And you’re one of the reasons I learn to live and love life more.
Thank you for loving me.
It was the greatest feeling I would forever be thankful for.

And now for three months you taught me so many things
To be real and honest to what I feel and show it by all means
To be disciplined in eating and still I’m not following
To minimize my voice especially while talking in public
To take care of myself more as I start caring for others especially you
To stretch my patience while waiting
Not to annoy you when you just woke up from sleeping
To explore yet learn to control
To make effort for someone you truly love or just atleast give him a call

I hope I could also sing to you the songs that you love most
And give you the sense of serenity when you listen to music of your choice
I hope I could always be there when you needed me
And give you time, time and more time
Please stretch your patience and understanding when things go wrong
And please let me know if I hurt you or I say something that upsets you
Sorry for my shortcomings, limitations and imperfections
Sorry for the times I can’t help you, or when I’m busy or I seem not to care when infact I do.
When I do wrong, please tell me gently
I am jealous at times, I’ll let you know when it’s over and I’m ready.
I tend not to like it when you say you’ll drink
I don’t want to control you as I believe you know your limit
Remember happy things when you’re down and lonely
Eating or sleeping might help a bit as well

I hope I am making you HAPPY
I trust you and definitely you can trust me too.
I want you to know that I’m blessed to have you
And that I highly admire you as I believe that you can do more and better
We don’t know what lies ahead for us
But I will be hopeful for what will always be best for both of us.
Let’s support each other’s dreams
And keep respect and sincerity be present certainly
I keep with me with all love, things we have shared together
Let’s keep it precious deep within our hearts.
My prayer is for us to grow happy and better
And our relationship and to our God will also grow stronger.
As promised I will be real to you and make you happy too.
I love you
Today, always and more!

HAPPY 3rd Monthsary!

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